悉達多第一次感覺到，我的身體不是我的，一直以來總無法相信指導者跟他說的，身體是不自由的，身體被外面及內在很多因素牽動著。
現在狼還很堅定跟自己說 : 你需要我的。
狼的話，強而有力穿刺的說：「悉達多，你自認的善，不堪一擊」
悉達多記得指導者說過 : 明白善、惡是解脫的第一個思考方向，了解了什麼，才能解脫什麼 !
生命導師啊 ! 悉達多嘴唇沒有力量發聲，只能用他的心顫抖喊著，「給我一點力量，我就要消失，我從來不知道我沒有力量，現在更連站著都有問題 !」
半寄
This
was the first time Siddhartha had ever felt that his body was not his own.
Although many times in the past his teacher had told him that the body has no
freedom, since it is constantly being affected by all sorts of factors, both
internal and external, he could never fully accept this idea.
At that
time, the wolf was certain that Siddhartha needed him.
Siddhartha
was proudly convinced that everything he did was in perfect conformity with the
standards of human ethics, and he was certain that no suffering or setback
would ever beset him. But now things were different, and all those tribulations
he thought were a thing of the past were now upon him. He had never gained a
deep understanding of good and evil, to say nothing of liberation, the quest
for which had become the focus of his life. Everything came to a halt in his
feeling and perception, in his views on good and evil, and in his ideas about
spiritual practice.
As for
this, the wolf pointedly declared, “Siddhartha, your understanding of goodness
is extremely fragile.”
“You
are my teacher in life!” said Siddhartha, dumbstruck for a moment, before
blurting out with trembling lips, “Give me some strength; I’m just about
finished; I’ve always thought of myself as strong and energetic, but right now
I can barely remain standing!”
Master Ban Ji
Translated by Ken Kraynak
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