南泉禪師斬貓
Master Nanquan
kills the cat
我們10月份南禪精舍的讀書會,李文宗居士要分享的「假如南泉禪師斬貓時,我就在現場」內容超讚的!在這裡先分享南禪好文給大家!
During the NanZen book club in October Jacky
Wen-tsung Li gave a
memorable talk
titled “If Master Nanquan Killed the Cat, Then I
Was There.”
What follows is an excerpt from his talk.
1. 一隻狗的死假如南泉禪師斬貓時,我就在現場每個星期三早上
7:30,我們全校學生會坐在學校中廊,老師帶著大家共讀一本
書。上個月,共讀的繪本是『我和我家附近的流浪狗』。繪本
中提到:有些野狗會造成環境的問題,所以政府有專門捕捉野狗
的單位,抓到的野狗如果沒有人認養,就會很快地被『處理
掉』! 讀到這裡,老師問學生:你曾經看過狗被殺嗎? 學生紛紛舉
手,一個一年級的小朋友說他親眼看到阿公殺死他們家的狗!(自
己殺死自己養的狗!聽到這兒,心裡立刻冒出:好殘忍的阿公啊!)
老師問:怎麼殺的?阿公把狗吊在樹上,1、2、3 狗一下就死了!
(啊!頭皮發麻、全身振了一下,真的好殘忍) 老師再問:阿公為什
麼要殺死他?學生說:狗一直咬死家裡養的雞,餵牠吃飼料不吃,就
一直咬死雞!雞在不斷被咬死阿公不堪其擾,很生氣,就把狗吊
在樹上! (聽到這裡,原先覺得殘忍的厭惡桿好像降低一些:如
果排除從小受到的教育影響,即刻作出反應,在殘忍的表面之
下,事情好像有一些值得討論的!)
1.
The death of a dog. “If Master Nanquan Killed the Cat, Then I
Was There.” Every
Wednesday morning at 7:30, all of the students
at our school sit in the central
corridor, and one of the teachers leads
them in reading a book. Last month, the
picture book we read
together was Me and
the Stray
Dogs
near My Home, which tells the story of a
neighborhood where
some stray dogs were making a mess and how the local
government
dispatched dog catchers to catch them and take them to the dog
pound. Any that didn’t get adopted were soon “disposed of.” At this
point the
teacher asked, “Have you ever see a dog get killed?” A
student raised his hand
and said that one time he watched his
grandfather kill their pet dog. (What a
cruel grandpa!) The teacher
asked how he did it, and the boy explained that he
put a rope around
its neck and hung the dog from a tree; after about three
seconds the
dog was dead.
(Ah! My scalp was numb and my whole body was
shaking. How barbaric!). The teacher asked him why he did it, and the boy
explained that the dog kept on killing their chickens instead of
eating its dog
food. Finally, grandpa got so angry that he hung the
dog from a tree! (Hearing
this, my original aversion to the killing
lessened a bit. If you exclude the
influence of the education you
received from childhood and react spontaneously,
underneath the
cruel surface, there seems to be something worth discussing!)
2. 假如南泉禪師斬貓時,我就在現場狗被吊死,阿公殺狗的事件
讓我想起南泉禪師斬貓。『看禪宗公案,需要把自己置身在現
場。』已經記不得,師父在什麼時候說過這樣的話,或者確切
的文字是不是如我所寫,也一直不太懂真正的意涵,但這個概
念一直留在我心裡。聽到狗被吊死的事,又要讀書會分享,於
是我開始認真的想:「假如南泉禪師斬貓時,我就在現場!」,我
會有什麼樣的反應? 南泉禪師斬貓時,現場有幾個角色?南泉禪
師、弟子們、貓,我另外加了一個旁觀者。假如我是『旁觀
者』,我看到斬貓會有什麼反應? 甲:出家人怎麼會搶貓? 乙:好
殘忍,可憐的貓啊! 丙:大師做的事都是對的,大師做的事都是
有道理的,不用懷疑! (是不是第一時間,心裡就立刻會出現比
較屬於道德式的反應,道德式的評論早已成為我們的預設立
場,甩開道德式的反應,我會有其他的反應嗎?) >
2. Now
if Master Nanquan killed the cat, then I was there when
grandpa hung the dog,
in that it reminded me of the gongan (Chan
parable) in which Nanquan kills
a cat. “When reading a gongan, you
have to read yourself into the story; read it as if you were there.” I
don’t
remember exactly when Shifu said this, or the exact words she
used, but this
idea has stuck with me ever since I heard it. After
hearing the story about
grandpa hanging the dog, I decided to share it
with the book club, and this got me wondering
about how I would
have responded if I had been there when Nanquan killed the
cat.
Let’s suppose that in addition to Nanquan, his disciples, and the cat, I
was also there. How would I have responded when he chopped the
cat in half? A:
In Buddhism, not killing is the first precept. How,
then, could a monastic do
such a vile deed? B: How cruel! Poor cat!
C: Undoubtedly, what Nanquan did was
right; for when a great
teacher does something like that, he surely has a good
reason for
doing it. (If it’s the first time anything like this has happened,
one’s
immediate reaction would probably be based on ethical indignation,
since
our default position is to evaluate such things from the
perspective of ethics
and morality. But apart from a moral-ethical
response, how else might have I
responded?)
假如我是『弟子們』,看到斬貓會有什麼反應? 甲:師父為什麼
斬了貓?一頭霧水! 乙:貓死了,立刻懷恨起跟你爭貓的同門師兄!
丙:貓死了,埋在深深的悲傷裡! 還是可以看到自己處在被貓拉
著的慣性中?然後願意試試在所愛消失的時候,能忍著感受,讓
心稍稍往後退一退!(想從一種慣性中脫離,需不需要一定的力
量?這種力量如果被培養、被挑戰成更強大?是壞了空的思想嗎?
還是正符合緣起法呢?) 假如我是『貓』我喜歡自己是被寵愛、
食無虞、風雨無需慮的貓(可能被斬)?還是自由自在、需要自負
生存的不確定性(刀來了想逃)? (年紀越大,我覺得我越來越可能
選擇成為被寵貓,就算會被斬) 假如我是『南泉禪師』甲:我敢
斬貓嗎? (光是讀書會要分享,我就多麼在意各位的評價,要我
斬貓,肯定會撕裂我的心) 乙:就算敢斬,我能有力量承受種種
議論嗎? (能無懼他人評價,內心力量的強大,是不是讓人難以
想像啊!)
If
I were one of Nanquan’s disciples, how would I have reacted when
he chopped the
cat in half? A: Why did he kill the cat? It’s utterly
inexplicable! B: As soon
as the cat is killed, I immediately begin to
nurse a grudge against the monks I
was arguing with. C: I become
thoroughly dejected. But would I be able to see that
I had become
fixated on the cat? Afterwards, perhaps I would try to accept my
feelings about the loss of something dear to me, as a way of
gradually taking
the edge off of my sadness. (Does getting free from
a habitual response require
a certain kind of energy? Can this kind of
energy be cultivated and increased
by facing such challenges? Does
this run counter to the doctrine of emptiness?
Does it conform to the
doctrine of dependent origination?) If I were a cat,
I’d probably want
to be someone’s precious pet, the sort which is doted on and
doesn’t
have to worry about food and shelter, but which might get chopped
in
half. Or would it be better to be a feral cat, footloose and fancy-
free, in
charge of my own survival, so that if some wild-looking
Chan master came
towards me brandishing a knife, I could easily
make a quick escape? The older I
get, the more likely it is that I’d
prefer being a pet cat, even at the risk of
coming under the knife.
Let’s suppose I were Nanquan. A: Would I dare to kill
the cat? (This
is purely rhetorical; I have a high regard for the views of
others; if I
actually did kill the cat, it would break my heart). B: Suppose I
go
ahead and kill the cat; would I be able to deal with the various
reactions
it would generate? (It’s hard to imagine being completely
unconcerned with how
others would react to such a cruel act.)
3. 其實,貓是不是就在我身上? 為了準備讀書會分享,我把師父
的著作『佛法的最終實現』與很喜歡的一本小說『希臘左巴』
再度拿出來翻閱。在『佛法的最終實現』書裡,師父引述中阿
含經一段:『比丘!多聞聖弟子非心將去,非心染著,非心自在。
比丘!多聞聖弟子,不隨心自在,而心隨多聞聖弟子』吸引住
我。這『心自在』---心想要做什麼,讓我想到了南泉公案裡的
貓,如果把貓看成是『心自在』的隱喻,那其實,貓是不是也
藏在我身上?貓找到了,那南泉呢?什麼時候我的身上可以出現
南泉? 至於『希臘左巴』倒是讓我看到不同的種類貓,有各種人
性軟弱面的貓,也有專屬於讀書人的貓---書讀太多看事情常太
多的道德、流於理想偏離實務或者凡事計算的太多,少了勇於
嘗試承擔錯誤的勇氣。當然也有專屬西方人的貓---雖然很能直
接面對人性、很懂人性,但卻也掙扎在理性與感性之間,不知
要走向何方或者乾脆臣服於上帝之下!
3.
Now, I can’t help but wonder if the cat is somehow a part of me.
In preparing
for the book club, I skimmed over Shifu’s Ultimate
Realization in Buddhism and one of my favorite novels, Zorba the
Greek. One of the passages from the Madhyamāgama quoted in
Shifu’s book reads, “Oh Monks, a learned noble
disciple is not led
about by the mind; is not tainted by the mind; is not
controlled by the
mind. Oh Monks, a learned noble disciple does not obey the
mind;
rather, the mind obeys the learned noble disciple” (fascicle 45, Sūtra
172). This idea of controlling the mind reminds me of the cat in this
gongan. If we take the cat as a metaphor for what
is controlling the
mind, then isn’t the cat a part of me? If this is what the
cat stands for,
then what does Nanquan stand for? What part of me does he
represent? When will I become like him? As for Zorba the Greek, it
has shown me that, like cats, there are various
types of people. One
is the soft and gentle type. Another is the bookish type,
who tends to
overemphasize ethics and morals, is overly idealistic at the
expense
of practicality, and always deliberating on things, while lacking the
courage to make mistakes. Then there is the typically Western type
of personality---good
at understanding human nature and dealing
with it head on, but caught up in a
struggle between reason and
emotion, so that he lacks a sense of direction or
else wholly submits
himself to the will of God!
4. 做不到,至少要看懂價值心經我們都會唸,都知道色、受、
想、行、識是空,但要怎麼空?如果願意認真的探討,那麼色、
受、想、行、識要空,就全然是關於人性的掙脫.對我而言,想
掙脫人性,卻不試著瞭解人性,不願在人性反方向培養力量站
立起來,這是在邏輯上無法接受的事!想修行怎麼可能不要力量?
不嚴肅看待掙脫需要力量,我們看待佛法就很容易迷失在文字
中,然後欣然地接受『ㄧ切都是虛幻的』、『ㄧ切都是心幻化
的』的迷湯,(完全不用費力、不用承認自己的軟弱)。『假如南
泉禪師斬貓時,我就在現場』的思索提醒我:雖然還沒有勇氣斬
貓,但至少我能看懂:能承受著心被撕開的力量是何等強大,值
得敬畏!
4.
Now, if this still doesn’t make sense, then it’s time to turn to the
venerable
Heart Sutra that we all know so well. Therein we are told
that the five
aggregates (form, feeling, perception, conditioning, and
consciousness) are
empty, but in what sense are they empty?
Reflecting on this in earnest, it
seems that the emptiness of the five
aggregates amounts to struggling against
human nature. As I see it, it
would be illogical to struggle against human
nature without trying to
understand it and without first cultivating the
strength to go against
human nature. How could there be Buddhist Practice
without this
kind of strength? If we don’t see that this struggle requires
strength,
then our understanding of Buddhism will remain on the superficial
level of its verbal expression, resulting in a facile acceptance of such
doctrinal statements as “All things are illusory” and “All things are
created
by the mind.” From this perspective, there’s no need to make
an effort, nor is
it necessary to acknowledge one’s weaknesses. So
the gist of this essay on
the gongan in which Nanquan kills the
cat is
this: while I don’t have the pluck required to kill a cat like that, at
least I can understand the teaching he thereby conveyed, and that it
takes an
awesome and fearsome force to cut off the mind of
attachment!
5. 真心的感謝以前不會很有動力來參加讀書會,一來因路途很
遠,二來因為修行是真的要跟人性搏鬥的,自己沒有真的搏鬥
過,談太多佛法都只是想像,流於盲人摸象!現在會比較有動力
來,不是因為我真的有搏鬥成功的經驗,是來讀書會聽聽師父
說法,常常會提醒自己不要忘記: 如果藝術大師的畫令人激賞,
文學名著讓人景仰,那麼修行人跨過人性的黑水溝(師父說:『那
像每天受海軍陸戰隊訓練』,我覺得最難的是你得身兼教官要
對自己嚴格),是該讓我五體投地的!(另一個原因:最近發現,平
常住山上,旗津海岸的豐富性讓我好驚豔,讀書會時可以順便
來) 謝謝師父以及讀書會,讓我有機會整理學佛多年雜亂的思
緒!準備的過程中重新翻書、仔細思索,我深深覺得自己受益良
多。也謝謝、歡迎師兄、師姐的聆聽,歡迎指正。最後,祈願
大家都能福德增長,深飲佛法智慧之水!
5.
I’m truly thankful for previously not being very motivated to
attend the book club. For one thing, it’s a long trip. More
importantly, Buddhist
Practice entails struggling against human
nature, and this is something I have
never been very inclined to do.
Too much discussion gets you stuck on the level
of imagination, so
that you become like the proverbial blind men describing the
elephant. At present I’m feeling more motivated to attend the book
club, not
because I’ve had any great success in struggling against
human nature, but
rather because listening to Shifu’s discourses on
the Dharma reminds me of the
great respect due to those who have
crossed over the foul-smelling ditch filled
with the murky water of
human nature. It’s the kind of admiration and awe one
gets when
seeing a great artist’s masterpiece or when reading the signature
work of a great writer. (Shifu compares this struggle against human
nature to
the grueling kind of training new recruits get in the Marine
Corps.) Another
reason I’ve been attending more often is that when
I’m at the monastery for the
book club, it gives me a good excuse for
visiting the Qijin seacoast and admiring
its stunning beauty. Many
thanks to Shifu and the book club for straightening
out all the
confused ideas about Buddhism that I’ve accumulated over the years.
In preparing for the book club by rereading some important books
and deeply thinking them over, I’ve gained a lot of benefit. Thanks
for
listening, and if anything I’ve said is incorrect, do feel free to
point it
out. Finally, may your joy and wisdom increase by imbibing
the wisdom of the
Buddhadharma!
Jacky Wen-Tsungx Li
Translated by Ken Kraynak
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